10 years of marriage.

Earlier this year I was gifted a book by a very dear friend of mine.  The book is Delight-full, 31 Days to a Happier Baby...And Wholehearted Motherhood.  It is a lovely book written by a really busy and joyful mom.  She has eight children and writes about simple and practical ways to add joy and delight to your parenting journey.

One particular chapter she tells a story about her wedding dress.  As I read it though, I could clearly in detail imagine exactly what happened because just two years ago I experienced the exact same thing.  spoiler alert: This might give away this particular chapter, but it is still worth the read.

She tells the story of her daughter discovering and opening her wedding dress that had been so carefully and meticulously wrapped and sealed.  And then her daughter opening her wedding dress, taking it out, and putting it on and joyfully exclaiming about how beautiful she was.  This is exact situation happened to us when Am was about 4 years old.  For years I had gotten the box out and we had looked at the dress through the window, and then we would put the box away again.  And one day I heard a happy exclamation of pure delight when my little girl said "Mommy!  Come Look!!"  I ran upstairs, curious as to what had her so happy and I - flipped my lid.

My face fell, my expressions did not mimic my daughters.  As joy emanated from her depths anger was boiling up from mine.  "Amariss! What are you doing???!?!?"  I exclaimed.  And the rest is history.  I gave her a punishment totally unfitting of the crime of wearing my wedding dress.  I was angry for way too long.

The precious box my dress had been stored in was demolished, and my wedding dress had no special home until my daughters were grown.

But when I read this strikingly similar story in Kate's book, I found a new perspective.  I've long since gotten over the wearing of my wedding dress, but my dress is still special to me and I want it to be special to my girls.  Kate tells us in her book of what she decided to do when her daughter opened up her wedding dress.  I wish my reaction had been similar.

Kate and her husband decided to make wearing Mommy's wedding dress a special occasion.  Every year, on their anniversary, they get out Kate's dress and the girls get to put it on and play in it.

I realized that my girls will probably out grow me by the time they are 12 (bless their sweet Daddy), so keeping my wedding dress for them until they are adults is an unrealistic idea.  I remember fitting my mom's wedding dress when I was 15 and modeling it for a mother-daughter night at church.  It was so incredibly fun.

So we have decided to pick up the Collins' tradition of wearing Mommy's wedding dress on our anniversary.

Today, my husband and I are celebrating 10 years of marriage.  I am so thankful for the man I married.  I think back through all we have been through in the last 10 years, and I cannot believe the ways we have changed.  I am so thankful that we have grown together through all of it and not apart.  I am so thankful that at the end of everyday when we curl up together, exhausted, that we feel each others love.  I am so thankful that when I woke up from anesthesia from my surgery a few weeks ago I couldn't stop crying because "I just love Aaron so much!" (yep.  that's what I woke up saying)  I am so thankful that Aaron has taken the role of priest of our home very seriously, and that he seeks God in every decision he makes.  I am so thankful that he challenges me and encourages me.  He is an incredibly outgoing man, and his love for people is something I need to learn.  He is confident and gracious.  I am so thankful that I married him.

This morning I had the girls try on my wedding dress.  They were so beautiful and they had so much fun!

If you think the "soft" around her is a special added effect, you can think again.
This is what happens when you have a toddler.  Need to clean the camera lens again!
Z - 2 yrs old

She thought this was an amazing experience. She posed perfectly.
Am - 6 yrs old

10 years with the love of my life.  So very thankful that God has blessed us with these two beautiful babes, I can't wait to see what the rest of our lives will look like.

Home study started? Check.

Public writing is so difficult.  There are so many things you want to say but just shouldn't.  There are times when all you can say is things you shouldn't say, so you don't say anything.  And then there are times when you have so much to say but don't know how to say any of it.

I've learned over the years, and even this week, that sometimes we need to keep our writings to ourselves.  These precious thoughts rambling around in our heads aren't always good to be shared.  Today I have thoughts, lots and lots of thoughts and probably none of them should be shared.  I had a hard time remembering my password to log in to blogger today.  It might have been God's way of not letting me in to write.  Or atleast making me double think the decision to write.

Really, how important is blogging?  I need sleep, lots and lots of sleep.  And instead of sleeping, I'm blogging.  There is reason enough to log out right now.

Here is my brief and uninteresting adoption update:

We have started our home study!!  Last week we had our first visit with our social worker and it was great!

I'm sure I could come up with more interesting stuff to say but that's about it.  I am so very very tired.

Have a great night, week, and possibly month!

Maybe by the time I write again we'll be finished with our home study!!  That would be pretty cool.