Remembering....

I've been thinking a lot lately.  About many many things - believe me.  But right now I want to write about these things.  These 6 babies and how they infiltrate my life.  How I can't tell the story of my girls or their names without bringing in these 6. 

A few weeks ago we had an open house in celebration of Zemirah's life.  An open house to thank all of those who have prayed for her with us, prayed us through dark days, or carried our load when we just couldn't take another step. 

At that open house I had these balloons - 3 pink, 3 blue; 6 in all for my 6 littlest ones. 

My heart still aches somedays for them.  At the strangest moments, when I'm cuddled up on the couch reading to Am and Z, when I'm holding Z and breathing in her sweet scent, or even just picturing the size of family we will have someday.  We named our girls specifically - that their names would tell their story.  And they do. 

They open the door to share God's miracles and provision in our lives. 

I always wonder what our lives would have been like if miscarriage wasn't such a large part of our story.  Would we still want as many kids?  Would we value them like we do now?  Would we even understand true grief?  I don't know.  We've learned a lot over these years - and I know we have much more to learn. 

And I look forward to the day that we will meet Baby K, Tiny, IddyBiddy, Cinco, Woven, and Bunnin. 

Musings on cloth diapering....

Cloth diapering... somedays I love it, somedays I hate it.  Today is diaper day - which would make you think that today I hate it... but today, I love it.

It is on diaper day that I usually most love cloth diapering.  Yes, it can be a hassle.  Yes, it is sometimes time consuming.  Yes, my diaper pail can get pretty stinky. 

BUT...

Here are some reasons I love it:

- When you go to the store and forget everything important, atleast you don't have to worry about having forgotten diapers.  Lets face it, the neighbors might have honey and chicken noodle soup when you have a cold, but what's the chance they have any size 2 diapers laying around?

- That baby butt only gets cuter when you put a little purple on it :)

- Sometimes washing diapers is what pulls me out of an "I'm tired and don't want to do anything" funk.  I have to wash the diapers, regardless, the baby will poop and I will have to change her into something.

- When I put a certain diaper on my baby I'm reminded of how blessed we truly are and am reminded to pray for orphans around the world...  see The Little Bee Co.

- I never run out of diapers! 

- Folding diaper laundry is brainless and surprisingly fun, makes me not feel so guilty about not folding the rest of my laundry.

- Not that I should strive to be "cool" but when I wash diapers and hang them out on the line I feel a little bit like my mom when she was a farm wife - and she's pretty cool :) 

- I love the smile Z gives me everytime I smear coconut oil on her butt.

- There are so many different options for cloth diapering, I get to have a little fun when I pick out what diaper to put on next.

- Sometimes I make my baby's diaper match her outfit. (rarely, because I have a hard time matching anything)

- Babies with giant butts look like Weeble Wobbles and who doesn't love a Weeble Wobble?

And Finally -

I love Cloth Diapering because I'm saving a whole lot of money! (which may be what carries me through on the days I want to give the whole thing up)

the end of July

July is over.  and to that you say "I know, Brie.  I've seen the calendar"

but with the end of July we have:

the end of miscarriage anniversaries for a few months

the death of most of my garden (either from rabbits, weeds, or heat - although I'm still pulling for some tomatoes)

the end of swim lessons for another year (side note: my 4 year old impressed the pants off of me and passed level 2 swimming, however she will not be able to advance to level 3 until she's 6.  my little swimmer...future olympian there.)

and finally what feels like a little bit of a breather. 

but really, who am I kidding?  This month is already filling up and my little big one starts preschool the first week of September.  My life is moving faster than I'd like it to.

Saturday we are hosting an open house for the baby, I will *hopefully* post pictures following!

Until then....