Stigmas

Today I was out running some errands (kid-free) around town. I noticed the time and headed over to my hubby's work to join him for lunch... on the way there I noticed...

**Let me preclude this story that I do not live in an "urban" area where it would be at all common to see this at any given point in time.**

A man riding a bicycle.  I'm not sure what you think when you see a man riding a bicycle in the middle of the day (not a common sight around here) but I generally think "homeless".  But after taking into account his helmet, bike gloves, nice clothes, and backpack I reassed my assumption to "lost his license".  Yes, I know, being judgmental comes easy for me... as I'm sure it does for you too.  Don't worry, I did eventually right myself...  most likely this man is riding his bicycle because he WANTS to.... either for the pure enjoyment, exercise, or economy of it all.  What you don't know, is that I thought all of that AND my husband has been training for the past month to start riding his bike to work (a 15 mile trip both ways).  Does that make the story worse? Yes, I'd say it does.   

So, here's how this fits in with the delicate balance... stigmas.  They are everywhere and don't for a minute think that stigmas don't bleed into our reproductive lives as well.  Why don't you have (more) kids?  When will you have (more) kids?  Do you not want (more) kids?

And if we don't know the person we probably won't ask.  We'll just create our own assumptions, which may be quite far from the mark of truth. 

This post is a tough one for me to write, because well - I'm admitting that I have probably thought or said those things at one time, and continue to say and think thoughtless things often. 

So, to eliminate stigmas regarding our reproductivity lets just say this.  If a person has no children, or one child, or two children, or however many is not enough for you - remember that you don't know their story. 

Each person has a different story to tell, how would you want yours told?  Be kind.