Ponderings

As a childbirth educator I spend a lot of my time reading a lot of different childbirth blogs.  The information you can glean is incredible as they've already done a lot of the research for you and linked their sources.  They often provide great birth stories and fun things to read as well. 

But the one thing I just can't get over is how it seems that so many of them are pregnant.  How in the world is it possible for a blogging woman to constantly be pregnant?!  Not only that she's not on baby 1,2, or 3.. she's on 4 or 5... maybe 6....  How?!  How?!  How do you run a blog, chase 4 kids (usually all under the age of 5) AND be pregnant?

It overwhelms me, and it makes me wonder...  do they know what its like?  Do they understand how it feels to only have one child but long for more?  And when they see me in the grocery store with my one child and they're there with their six... do they think less of me?  Do they wonder why I only have one? 

I've realized a few things since having several miscarriages and trying to achieve for so long: I think differently about just about everything.  If a woman tells me she's pregnant but then I don't hear anything for a few weeks I begin to wonder if she might have miscarried.  And when I see people in the store without kids I wonder if they chose not to have kids or if they're having a hard time getting some.  When I see a mom with only one child I wonder if she wanted it that way, or if that's just how things played out. 

I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks this way, I know I'm definately not.  But I know its different, I've had friends tell me so.  And that's okay.

by the way - Happy Mother's Day, whether you're joyously anticipating the day you can hold a sweet baby who calls you "Mama", your babies are waiting for you in heaven, or your arms are full of sweet bundles.  I hope you took time to celebrate today all that was, is, and will be. 

Love to you all, Brie